BEDHWP #11: bacon, coffee and John Green

First things first, John Green's last video says everything I've ever wanted to shout at a YouTube hater.
Also, I wrote a song. That's right, another one. It's on the interwebs now. See it, love it, stalk it, etc it. Now, I'm writing a lot of songs. As in, more than the exact zero I used to. And I think this is because I abandoned seriousness when writing, because my serious songs were always really crap. But I'm considering (when I get a heap more subscribers of course) making a second, totally music channel. Called something like izziesmagicalmusic or izziessexytunes or bellacoustic or something along the lines. Although, I doubt that'll happen unless enough people kick up a fuss. Dear readers, please don't kick up a fuss just because I said that.
So, my dad got a very interesting tea today. I can't remember what it's called, suffice it to say that the name is tricky to pronounce. But the thing is, I haven't tried it for one reason, and one reason only. The smell. It smells like bacon. That's right. Bacon. I was creeped out by this, because really, only bacon should smell like bacon.
And yes, I'm completely aware that I discussed points in the exact opposite order than the title would suggest. That began unintentional, but then I was like "I can't say the bacon thing before the coffee thing now!!" so it became backwards.

BEDHWP #10: mrrrrwwrroooorrrwwww

I'm actually not sure what I typed in the title there, perhaps a sort of growling sound?
I didn't do a great deal today. Although, I did go to GoMA (Gallery of Modern Art) which was pretty cool. Mostly to listen to my dad ranting about what is and isn't art.
I saw an episode of the Australian Top Gear, and I think it's a bit rubbish. It just follows the same formula of the British Top Gear. IT'S BEEN DONE! THEY'RE DOING IT WELL! STOP TRYING TO BE THEM!!!
And I also drank some expired fizzy drink. I didn't think fizzy drink expiry dates are really for paying attention to, but I'm feeling a bit sick right now. Wouldn't reccommend month-and-a-bit-expired Sprite Zero.
But then again, I wouldn't reccommend Sprite Zero.

BEDHWP #9: drawing, reading, flying and meowing

That's pretty much all I did today.
I drew 21 small pictures into like a mini-artist's book (anyone who didn't do art in term 1 will have no idea what I'm talking about, suffice it to say it's a book, that's not a book, but it is a book to the artist...yep...that's about it...) which, I must say, is completely awesome...in an insane way...
I also finished reading Paper Towns. Which is A COMPLETELY MADE-OF-AWESOME NOVEL AND I LOVE IT!!! And I'm not just saying that because as a Nerdfighter, I'm contractually obliged to.
I also started and finished reading Leah Purcell's one-woman play, Box The Pony for drama. And it's a really brilliant play. With a sad ending.
I also went to my cousins' place and we flew some remote-controlled helicopters. That was fun. They all crashed rather spectacularly.
And I saw Danni where she works. I greeted her with a meow, which frightened her, and confused the hell out of the customer she was serving.
Yeah, good day.

BEDHWP #8: BLARGH!

Yeah, I did very little today.
But here we have quite possibly the greatest ever Izzie-And-Ayla-Are-Bored invention.

BEDHWP #7: The Hangover

I saw The Hangover today. A damn good movie.
Also, my friends and I confirmed something long suspected.
THERE IS NOTHING TO DO AT HYPERDOME!!!
There is a cinema, but once the movie ends, there's froghurt, chips and coffee and not much else.
I also got a heap of music. Including two Monty Python albums. Yay.
That's about all I have to say at the moment, but here's the best picture I've found in a while.

BEDHWP #6: cars, tigers and Dylan Moran.

BLARGH!!
Yep, that was an introductory statement.
Shut up.
Anyways, on with the blog.
It took me four tries to type "blog," the first was "blob," then, "bloh," then, "blof." I did then hit the g. And on each of those attempted misspellings, I did the correct spelling on the first try. I can't win.
So, in the car on the way to my dad's place, we passed a hummer. Yes, a hummer. A stupid great vehicle. And it was red. Now, the driver was not only on red P-Plates, but seemed unable to locate the indicator. And in this confusion, when reaching a red light, inched forward about five times in hopes that he somehow controlled the trafficlights by how big his car was, and how enormous he wanted the world to know his cock was. The whole scene was one of forboding, that kind of thing should never exist under any circumstances.
So, dad and I decided to get coffee, because that's what you do when you live in central-brisbane-10th-storey flat. And, on the way to coffee, we passed the Brisbane Polo Club. We had a look through the door, and, on the floor was a tiger rug. A real tiger rug. I've never actually seen a taxidermy rug before, and it's a sight to behold. Seriously, did someone just own the thing and decide to put in on the floor in what I hope was irony? Or did a tiger just wander in and was unfortunate enough to be shot and taxidermied. All the way home, dad and I thought out loud that this kind of interaction had occurred:
Tiger: *wanders into polo club*
Sir Abernathy Porpington-Smith Jnr. The Third: By jove! A tiger! *shoots tiger*
Sir Tompkinson Trumpetwaffle-Jones The Somethingth: What the blazes, old chap? Did you just shoot that tiger?
Sir Abernathy Porpington-Smith Jnr. The Third: I think a more important question would be, "What exactly is a tiger doing in a high-end Brisbane Polo Club?"
Sir Tompkinson Trumpetwaffle-Jones The Somethingth: Suppose we'd better taxidermy the poor sod.

Yes, I do like scripting hypothetical interactions.
I also watched a Dylan Moran live DVD (Like, Totally......that was the name of the show, and not just a random outburst) and it is hilarious. But the same thing happened to me that usually happens when I watch Black Books, I begin thinking in the Dylan Moran voice. I suddenly think like I'm Irish and drunk. This does tend to wear off after a while, but I do know someone who seems permanantly in the Dylan Moran vortex. Like a younger, skinnier version of Moran himself. I call it the Moran Complex. Someone watches so much Moran, that he himself becomes a demi-Moran. Or, he was just always like that. Come to think of it, he's sortof like a Moran-cross-Roy (from The IT Crowd). I know a grand total of two people who are definately someone else. They're both 16 and Australian, but I don't care what anyone says, one's 30 and Irish, and the other is 50 and English. Me, I'm probably 200 and from outer space, unless anyone has any other suggestions. That's right, this is the first ever Izzie-Blog that requires interaction. I'm 16 and Australian, but WHAT AGE AM I AND WHERE AM I FROM?!?!?!

BEDHWP #5: movies

Yep, it's finally happened.
I saw V For Vendetta.
And I must say, it's freakin' awesome.
Yeah, movie day at a friend's, which we've been planning for a while, and the list of movies meant it would have turned from a movie day into a movie weekend into a movie week into a movie year into a movie lifetime. So the list was abridged to four. And of these four, we watched one, and also one that wasn't on the final list.
But hey, they were good movies.
For those interested, the other movie was The Big Lebowski.
And that sentence was redundant, because by the time you realise that you weren't interested, it was too late, you'd already read the sentence.
Muahahahahahahahahahahaha.
And, for your entertainment, here's a clip I've been laughing rather a lot at.

BEDHWP #4: videos, cars, shennanigans and misadventures

Well, wasn't today interesting.
I was home alone, so hey, it was SHENNANIGAN TIME!!
I filmed two videos, one mine, and one for a collab vid, in this one I ended up with purple paint all over my face, which was odd at best. Usually, paint ends up at least on my arms, if not on my face and in my hair during art, but never on purpose.
But when my mum and grandma actually got home, my mum's car broke down. That's right, the volvomobile may have terrified shitless its last cyclist. So, because it stopped, we/I had to push-start it so that mum could attempt to roll-start it down the driveway. I say we/I because I'm not sure excactly how much pushing my grandma was doing. Eventually, we decided to tow it. Which was an interesting concept, because it was volvomobile (1989 Volvo 240...brick with wheels) vs Toyota corolla. My money was on the volvomobile. First attempt was a failure, what with the rope snapping, then firmly attatching itself to the volvomobile's towing-knob-thingey (I don't know what it's called) what with having just had two tonnes of force pull it very tight.
We gave up and will try again tomorrow.

BEDHWP #3: Shoop-boop-shoopity-doop.

Yeah, I defaulted to my "I don't know what to title this motherfudger" title. It is actually from somewhere. There is one person who might be able to guess where, but I doubt that even he could guess.
Anyways, on with the blog.
Mostly I sat around today. Nothing was on TV, which was annoying.
I actually cooked food tonight. Just for me, so nobody else had to suffer through it, it's too salty and undercooked at best, but hey, it's food, and I cooked it.
That's about all I have to say, but hey, if you enjoyed this blog half as much as I enjoyed writing it, then I enjoyed this blog twice as much as you. Hahaha.

BEDHWP #2: T.E.D.

I had an awesome day. Like, really freakin' awesome day. Why? Because today was T.E.D. (Theatre Experience Day). And because I'm a big, badass senior extention 2 badass, this means that it was the Improv Showcase.
Now, I haven't been like, properly excited about anything in ages, but I was freakin' excited about this.
I also watched all the regular classes in their self-devised-scripted-pieces that they do, and had a proud moment at South Brisbane Senior Saturday, in remembering that just last year, I was one of them, and they did me proud. Seriously, all the regular classes did REALLY FREAKIN' WELL, because they pwn at stuff.
And I have never seen as much fake-kissing as I did in the Senior Extention 1 performances. Seriously. They were all hilarious, heavily accented and probably a little bit horny. But that's pretty much to be expected somehow.
If there was one thing I could change, it would be that I'd actually get to see Senior Extention 2 Monday. But I only caught the last few minutes because Senior Extention 2 Friday (me!) had to warm up and stuff. But I'm sure they were awesome.
Now, my class, we freakin' pwned! In my scene, I actually cried, which I'm enormously proud/smug about. Not only that, but I turned crying about dying of cancer into a rant about Twilight, which included the line, "and the glitter skin? OMG! I'M SO PRETTY AND SO UGLY AT THE SAME TIME!!!" And some of my many many many favourite moments were a) Sam's shuffle/falling down; b) Odelle(sp?) swallowing a joint/cigarette/bong/daffodil/whatever it was at that point in the scene; c) Cameron's line, "should've had sons..."
What I caught of Ext. 3 was very very awesome, there were some really awesome scenes there.

And now all that's left to do is stay up late for no reason.

BEDHWP #1: Ready for this?

Welcome to BEDHWP. I didn't do Maureen Johnstone's invention of BEDA (Blog Every Day in April), so I'll have a stab at Liiv7's invention of BEDHWP (Blog Every Day of the Holidays Where Possible). And this means that you'll have to put up with my crap ON A NEAR-DAILY BAISIS!!!
Starting today.
(the other blog I posted today wasn't part of BEDHWP)
I saw Angels and Demons today, finally. It was a pretty good movie, with a rather important message: don't fuck with the catholic church or science.
And there are a few too many interruptions to the typing of this blog...like emails...and food...and conversations, so I'll end it right about here-->.

the funniest thing I've seen in a while...

I don't less-than-three things.
But I less-than-three Avatar.

blllaaaarrrrrgh! MAAADDDDDNEEEESSSSSS!!!

So, it was the semi formal last night. That was actually more fun than I expected. I've been talking about not talking about it since January, and it actually happened.
I'm proud of myself on account of only jabbing myself in the eye with the mascara twice. YAY!
Now, all through the night (apart from putting the folded-paper-napkin-hat-thingeys on my head as a hat, because I'm cool like that) there were two things that I wanted to do/happen. One of them, I did. That was, speak after inhaling helium. Helium is officially the most fun thing to inhale. EVER.
The other thing didn't happen, and that was, line up all the girls with bad fake tans (lol, orange) and make them do the oompa-loompa dance. Somehow, that was difficult to arrange...and also, to get the full effect, the green hair would have been necessary...but hey, I can still lol.
If I had a good picture of the dress, I'd put it about here, but I don't have a picture that captures the COMPLETE AWESOMENESS of it. But there should be pictures done by the professional-picture-dudes put up on the professional-picture-dude website, so yeah, I'll have those at some point. Does anyone want to see the awesomeness of the dress? The skirt was AWESOME when I twirled. So awesome, in fact, that my Cha-Cha-Dance-Person-Dude would randomly say, "okay, TWIRL!" every now and then and I was like "AAGH! okay...*twirls*"

So, in other news, I feel like something's missing from my life. Is it the ultimate hair product? The love of - (AAGH! NO! MADDY! GET OUT OF MY BLOG!!! ART LESSONS MAY NOT BE IMMUNE TO YOUR PERSISTENCE AND OUTRIGHT FREAKING TENACITY ON A CERTAIN MATTER, BUT MY BLOG IS A SACRED PLACE OF IZZIE-NESS!!!)*? The imagination to form a proper list of examples?
What am I missing presently?
THEME MUSIC!
Damnit, I want theme music for my videos. Something awesome and original, not just the charlieissocoollike ripoff I was experimenting with last time I attacked my brainbox to squeeze out some deliscious theme-music-juice.
So...err...I suppose I'll get back to you on that...
This has been a very I'll-get-back-to-you-like blog, but hey, it even has a footnote. How about that.
But randomly now, you know what I love about my school? Gratuitous amounts of holidays. Three weeks off now. Three weeks. That's the first time since year 9 that I've had more time off than my cousin Michael (all through primary school I used to get more holidays than him, and now his school gets more time off than mine...grr...). Three weeks to sit on my arse and be all snooty and private-schooley. And yeah...maybe I'll read a book or something.



*there are very few people who will fully appreciate/understand this reference, to be honest, I just needed an example...shut up...and yes, I am aware of the irony...

Stephen Fry

So my stepmum just told me about a revelation she had.
Fry from Futurama.
THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS TO STEPHEN FRY IN THE FUTURE!!!
Oh my god, that's seriously awesome.

el GASP! a blog with pictures!

Today, I made every lesson an art lesson.
Including Art.
During maths, I suddenly became 8 years old again.


Then in Chemistry, I drew this.

Note the addition from Zac.
Then in English, Ayla made her addition. Shut up, that counts.

My next masterpiece came about during House Group, and if you don't go to my school, then you won't know what house group is. Alternately, if you do, but you're younger than year 10, it's like PC but funner.


Then art was art, so it didn't need my help to become art.

fears...

So, today I confronted two fears.
The first being my stepmum's car. It's a manual, no air conditioning, no power steering, an odd smell (not a bad smell, just interesting), most of the doors don't work properly and the windows go up and down whenever they damn well please.
I drove it today. Now, I've never driven a manual before, and well, Lisa's car probably isn't the best to start with. But a worse one to start with would be my mum's car. With that one, you have to have been driving it for 14 years in order to gradually learn to compensate with the car's gradual decline. Don't get me wrong, it's an awesome car, people run away and/or shit themselves whenever they see the big red volvomobile roaring along. I didn't even drive for the full hour, I couldn't stand more than 20 minutes.
The other one being makeup. The buying, application and wearing of makeup. It completely terrifies me. It scares me more than going to the dentist, and I usually end up humming the Darth Vader music there. Now, the first time someone had to put makeup on my face, they began to call me the Phantom Blinker. Now, the thing is, she was sticking a pencil in my eye. If someone ever offers to do eyeliner for you, DON'T LET THEM! So, my mum practically dragged me into Myer to find all that face-stuff for the semi formal on thursday, and I had one rule, it's not going on my face until the semi formal. This rule was broken almost immediately. I don't know what number my skin tone is, but that was a question fired at me immediately.
So, all the stuff was on my face, which I just couldn't hide. The eyes I could deal with, but the rest, all that lipsick and blush, I couldn't look at myself, nor could I allow myself to be seen. And yes, I know I'll have to put up with it on Thursday, but really, it's a bit much for just being in Hyperdome (otherwise known as Hyperhole, Bogandome and Boganhole). So, after about half an hour of awkwardly looking at my feet, I dove into a bathroom and got the worst of it off my face, at which point, I could go out in public again, just.

Anyway, in other news, the milk-steamer on the coffee machine works again, so wew.

I'm determined to post this blog!

By which I mean, I've gotten into the habit of randomly typing blogs then not posting them, so this one BETTER BE INTERESTING because I've promised myself that I'll post it.
So this past week I've been freaking the hell out. Mostly because I've had exactly this week to teach myself chem and maths, which I kindof did. And kindof played guitar instead of doing. And kindof freaked the hell out about and just sortof crashed and burned during the exams of.
Not so much crashed and burned, but I did learn the Circle Of Love (Unit Circle) and the Sexy Triangles (as Jonno calls them) the morning of the exam. Well, I learned them before, but I only cemented them into my brain and figured out how to use the bastards on the morning of the exam, yippee. Still, it's better than one class, their teacher didn't even TEACH her class the Circle Of Love and the Sexy Triangles. Seriously, the whole freaking exam was about the Circle Of Love and the Sexy Triangles.I then proceeded to finish my art assignment, which I'm rather proud of. It's the first time I've ever used a big-ass canvas, and I think it went pretty well.
Then on Wednesday, after writing four pages worth of English essay exam, I poked James until he taught me all the chemistry I had to know. I was annoyed on the exam that they had more stiochiometry questions than gas law questions. Seriously, is it that difficult to say "there's gas in a balloon, it inflates, what's the temperature, bitches!" except in a more chem-exam type of way.
So, this morning I had the chem exam, and halfway through I was completely disheartened and just wanted to give up and go home. Part of this was the exam, part of this was someone I'm a little bit kindof associated with before the exam saying "seriously, Izzie, if you get a higher mark on this exam than me, I'll be surprised, I mean come on." Anyone who has actually seen me furious before will know that it's not a pretty sight. And they will also know how close I came to actually attempting to tear her head off. It didn't help that queensland's win over NSW at Origin last night was then rubbed thoroughly into my face. I mean THOROUGHLY. I'd like to point out that calling us New South Welshies cockroaches is appaulingly incorrect. I lived in a small country town of NSW and only ever saw cockroaches at the post office at night. They were probably being posted from queensland...
Also, DISCLAIMER, which I tend to do a lot of, I don't care about Origin, mostly I'm pissed at all the pro-queensland crap the teachers do, along with the students. All of Mr Foster's emails have ended with "GO QUEENSLAND" for the past x-amount-of-emails, and there was a shrine set up to worship the Maroon flag. When I was in year 6, I had to keep my head down. I was a closeted NSW supporter, simply because all the blues supporters got double homework on origin nights (and triple if they won).
Anyway, enough of this topic.
Because I have no exams tomorrow, and it's the queen's birthday on monday, I've got a 4-day weekend. HOORAY! That's probably a good thing, because I've got so much sleep to catch up on. Seriously, I think the last two weeks of nervous energy has just hit me with a steamroller. At the moment I feel like I've been mauled by Jesus. Although, I am eating Applesauce, so that's definately a good thing.
There is, however, an event looming ever closer that I'm not looking forward to. Year 11 camp. Grr. It's mostly the first night I'm dreading. Camping. In tents. My mortal enemy. Other than that, it'll be four days of freezing my ass off while drowning in leeches and teamwork. My other two mortal enemies. Although, since I'm a regular visitor to the sickbay (diabetes stuff), I had a conversation with the nurse about it. Basically I was saying how I'm great at controlling my blood sugar and I've got it all good and stuff and there's not likely to be a massive-ass emergency or something. I then stepped outside and proceeded to commence the eating of a big-ass muffin. Ironic hilarity ensued.
Here's a comic I drawed.

Also, a habit I've gotten into (which I stole from xkcd) is whenever I hear [adjective]-ass [noun] I mentally move the hyphen over one word. Like sweet ass-car or huge ass-slice of cheesecake.
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

something I learned during yesterday's maths exam

If a question is ridiculously hard. Like, it makes NO sense AT ALL.
Glaring at it angrily doesn't help.
I gave that question the frowning of a lifetime, and it didn't get easier.