My mum and my grandma are terrible at telling jokes.
Grandma: *tells 12-inch-pianist joke*
Grandma: *stuffs up 12-inch-pianist joke*
Me: That's fantastic, except you told it wrong.
Grandma: No I didn't.
Me: Well, what's supposed to happen is *tells 12-inch-pianst joke correctly*
Grandma: Alright fine.
Me: Seriously, how do you stuff up the 12-inch-pianist joke? It takes skill to stuff up the 12-inch-pianist joke.
Mum: Right, so there's this bloke who goes into this pub and he's got an ENORMOUS PENIS.
Me: *laughs tea through nose*
Monday, March 30, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Seriously?
I had a diabetes clinic last Thursday. Nothing serious, just went in, talked to the 'educator' (in inverted commas because i'm not entirely sure what she does) and looked at results of various tests.
Anyway.
There was a flyer that caught my attention, mainly because it was front-and-centre on a bench that i was leaning on in order to talk to the receptionist.
Are you aged 13-16?
Would you like to meet other young people with type 1 diabetes?
Well, meet at (insert place here) on Saturday, from 1-3 pm.
Now, call me a traditionalist, but I just don't think that an ailment is an appropriate way to meet new friends.
Anyway.
There was a flyer that caught my attention, mainly because it was front-and-centre on a bench that i was leaning on in order to talk to the receptionist.
Are you aged 13-16?
Would you like to meet other young people with type 1 diabetes?
Well, meet at (insert place here) on Saturday, from 1-3 pm.
Now, call me a traditionalist, but I just don't think that an ailment is an appropriate way to meet new friends.
YouTube
My youtube life is full of random achievements.
The first was when someone I DIDN'T know subscribed to me.
The second was the first time I was put on the charts of popularity (coming in at the sixty-somethingth most viewed Australian Comedian).
Then I got recognised by a random at school.
The next was actually meeting people over YouTube.
And now, my latest video.
It's got 66 views since yesterday, making it more viewed than 5 of my older videos, which have had time on their side.
I didn't realise that Vlogs could be so popular, but it's gotten me to the place of 25th most viewed Australian comedian today.
I only made it to relieve the one-week video drought, but it's actually a bit popular (by the standards of my videos).
I should vlog more often.
The first was when someone I DIDN'T know subscribed to me.
The second was the first time I was put on the charts of popularity (coming in at the sixty-somethingth most viewed Australian Comedian).
Then I got recognised by a random at school.
The next was actually meeting people over YouTube.
And now, my latest video.
It's got 66 views since yesterday, making it more viewed than 5 of my older videos, which have had time on their side.
I didn't realise that Vlogs could be so popular, but it's gotten me to the place of 25th most viewed Australian comedian today.
I only made it to relieve the one-week video drought, but it's actually a bit popular (by the standards of my videos).
I should vlog more often.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Sunday, March 22, 2009
new magical glasses? WHAT?
I need new glasses. But I love my current glasses.
And I can't just get the new lenses put into my current frames, because I need to keep the frames for a hugely complex reason.
But as much as I love glasses, I'm not much in to shopping for them.
Why? Because my interpretation of what should go on my face seems completely different to what everyone else thinks should go on my face, and this was proven when Lyndal tried to do my makeup once, she'll not be trying that again. THEY WILL NOT MAKE ME OVER!
Anyway. Last time, I had the idea in my head that I wanted red, rectangular-framed glasses, but I also thought that electric green would be cool as well, and this is what I told my mum. And if anyone knows how fickle I am and that you should take what I say seriously but not too seriously, especially when it comes to me making a decision, then they will have a pretty clear idea about the conversations that followed. I absolutely fell in love with the frames I have, but mum insisted that we shop around, so we did, and we ended up back where we started, the frames I have now.
My dad is constantly trying to convert me to titanium, because the frames they make are light and fine and from a distance you can barely see them. This, however, is not my idea about glasses. My idea is chunky plastic that can be seen a mile off. This does not stop his case, and he doesn't seem to understand that I love wearing glasses, I really do, they don't bother me in any way, and in fact, they're the most fantastic thing I own (that can be worn). Anyway...
So, we're looking around for glasses in the city today, but found nothing, here's what was going on in my mind as I tried on each pair of frames:
No
No
These make me look like mum
These make me look like grandma
These make me look like Velma from Scooby-Doo
These are stupid
These have unnecessary bling
These are pretty good...oh, wait...they're prada...ugh...
These make me look like a pedophile
These are Dad's
I'm fairly sure these are Grandad's
These are just plain awful
These are too geeky
These aren't geeky enough
I've said 'no' to far too many to even consider these
So then we went to Carindale, because my dad's favourite optometrist is there (yeah, weird, shut up) but it turns out they've moved somewhere else that we don't know where is.
But guess how may optometrists there are in Carindale. FIVE. But guess how many were open today. TWO.
One held glasses the likes of Harry Potter and old people, and the other had TOO MANY FANTASTIC FRAMES. Seriously. My "maybe" pile was huge.
Anyway, I went for some black-and-green Converse frames that are just fantastic (and were at a 25% discount, score).
So, apparrently I'll have them in 6-10 days, and until then, I'll be using my old ones, making the most of the time we have left together...*cries quietly*
And I can't just get the new lenses put into my current frames, because I need to keep the frames for a hugely complex reason.
But as much as I love glasses, I'm not much in to shopping for them.
Why? Because my interpretation of what should go on my face seems completely different to what everyone else thinks should go on my face, and this was proven when Lyndal tried to do my makeup once, she'll not be trying that again. THEY WILL NOT MAKE ME OVER!
Anyway. Last time, I had the idea in my head that I wanted red, rectangular-framed glasses, but I also thought that electric green would be cool as well, and this is what I told my mum. And if anyone knows how fickle I am and that you should take what I say seriously but not too seriously, especially when it comes to me making a decision, then they will have a pretty clear idea about the conversations that followed. I absolutely fell in love with the frames I have, but mum insisted that we shop around, so we did, and we ended up back where we started, the frames I have now.
My dad is constantly trying to convert me to titanium, because the frames they make are light and fine and from a distance you can barely see them. This, however, is not my idea about glasses. My idea is chunky plastic that can be seen a mile off. This does not stop his case, and he doesn't seem to understand that I love wearing glasses, I really do, they don't bother me in any way, and in fact, they're the most fantastic thing I own (that can be worn). Anyway...
So, we're looking around for glasses in the city today, but found nothing, here's what was going on in my mind as I tried on each pair of frames:
No
No
These make me look like mum
These make me look like grandma
These make me look like Velma from Scooby-Doo
These are stupid
These have unnecessary bling
These are pretty good...oh, wait...they're prada...ugh...
These make me look like a pedophile
These are Dad's
I'm fairly sure these are Grandad's
These are just plain awful
These are too geeky
These aren't geeky enough
I've said 'no' to far too many to even consider these
So then we went to Carindale, because my dad's favourite optometrist is there (yeah, weird, shut up) but it turns out they've moved somewhere else that we don't know where is.
But guess how may optometrists there are in Carindale. FIVE. But guess how many were open today. TWO.
One held glasses the likes of Harry Potter and old people, and the other had TOO MANY FANTASTIC FRAMES. Seriously. My "maybe" pile was huge.
Anyway, I went for some black-and-green Converse frames that are just fantastic (and were at a 25% discount, score).
So, apparrently I'll have them in 6-10 days, and until then, I'll be using my old ones, making the most of the time we have left together...*cries quietly*
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Princess Ball
ZOMG!
The Short Stack (Australian Indie band) concert, aka Princess Ball, was AWESOME.
As far as imprompteu crimps go, the one between me and Shaun Diviney was pretty awesome (if you're not a fan of Short Stack or the Mighty Boosh, none of that will make sense to you).
So yeah.
It was fantastic.
I wonder how many "Shimmy a Go Go" jokes I can make
well, two
There was a Go Go, and it was Shimmied
I'll Shimmy your Go Go anyday ;D
The Short Stack (Australian Indie band) concert, aka Princess Ball, was AWESOME.
As far as imprompteu crimps go, the one between me and Shaun Diviney was pretty awesome (if you're not a fan of Short Stack or the Mighty Boosh, none of that will make sense to you).
So yeah.
It was fantastic.
I wonder how many "Shimmy a Go Go" jokes I can make
well, two
There was a Go Go, and it was Shimmied
I'll Shimmy your Go Go anyday ;D
Monday, March 16, 2009
hmm...
I'm definately my father's daughter. And I'm not talking the obvious reasons, I'm talking something slightly...unnerving.
I opened the fridge to find two bottles of milk. One that was full and one that at first glance appeared empty. Upon closer inspection, the empty one was in fact, not empty, but had a layer of milk measuring at less than one centimetre on the bottom of the two-litre bottle. Not enough for a decent coffee, maybe enough for a not-very-milky cup of tea, and forget about milo.
But, the strangest thing about this situation is not that my father put this stupid, ridiculous, useless amount of milk BACK IN THE FRIDGE.
No, that wasn't the most unnerving thing.
The most unnerving thing is that I do that too.
I opened the fridge to find two bottles of milk. One that was full and one that at first glance appeared empty. Upon closer inspection, the empty one was in fact, not empty, but had a layer of milk measuring at less than one centimetre on the bottom of the two-litre bottle. Not enough for a decent coffee, maybe enough for a not-very-milky cup of tea, and forget about milo.
But, the strangest thing about this situation is not that my father put this stupid, ridiculous, useless amount of milk BACK IN THE FRIDGE.
No, that wasn't the most unnerving thing.
The most unnerving thing is that I do that too.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
The Tempest
Is a damn good play.
Saw it last night.
The thing with Shakespeare is that the plays themselves are great, but whether they're watchable is entirely up to the director. If they're directed well, they're fantastic (as last night's was) but if they're directed badly, it makes The Viewer want someone to die slowly and painfully.
Saw it last night.
The thing with Shakespeare is that the plays themselves are great, but whether they're watchable is entirely up to the director. If they're directed well, they're fantastic (as last night's was) but if they're directed badly, it makes The Viewer want someone to die slowly and painfully.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
My day
It started really bad. Like REALLY bad. I actually haven't had a proper bad day since grade 9, and I haven't had to duck into a nearby bathroom just to calm down since year 6. So yeah, it was bad.
It started by the fact that I was very nearly late. By which I mean if my guitar lesson had been at a time that wasn't 8:30, I would have been late because of the fact that I have to go up to the music studios, put my guitar in the room and then go to class, which takes about ten minutes, but I had time, what with going straight to the lesson. But that meant missing out on the first half of Art, and I love Art, it's nice and relaxing. And now I realise that I should be learning my script for drama, bollocks. Anyway, my english teacher appeared. She's always making jokes about me appearing and playing Stairway to Heaven. This cheered me up mildly, because in amongst her usual jokes, she started humming a tune, that SO wasn't Stairway. In fact, it was SO glaringly Sunshine Of Your Love.
But anyway, the reason I was nearly late was the fact that my mum or her girlfriend, not sure which, but probably the latter, had been tidying. Now, this is fine, but she's somehow not learned a very important fact about me. DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF. It sounds juvenile, I know, but my room is a complete mess for a reason, I KNOW WHERE EVERYTHING IS. As soon as you start organising things, that's when I lose them. It's like the way I never lose my stationary, I just lend it to people who do. Anyway, it took me longer than usual to find two textbooks (which I never ended up using anyway) that were, you guessed it, tidied away in a sensible place, the drawer. Stuff doesn't go in that drawer, because if it does, it gets lost forever.
So, at the lesson, Breen and Jermia (the other two in my group) cheered me up no end, and I even got some advice (thanks Breen). After the lesson I went on a tangent, because Breen is one of few people who don't immediately tune out when it looks like I'm about to launch into one of my infrequent but fun rants. I ranted about the usual things, family, friends, subjects, guitar ensemble, loss of sleep, stupids. Then I got to art and did my usual calm-down, ie. get out the oil pastels/coloured pencils (today it was the pastels) and draw some soothing, blue patterns on a piece of paper (this could be anything from curvy lines to repetedly writing "I like traffic lights" and believe me, there is a story behind the traffic lights) then hacking it to shreds with the scissors. Unfortuneately this did little to ease the tension that was probably turning into cancer. Maths did little to intellectually stimulate me, as usual.
Then it got suddenly less dreary. The day was turned around, it actually got good. There really is something that cheers me up as much as acting does. That is my weekly singing lesson. I got to miss out on the first part of Chemistry for it, so I completely got away with not doing my homework and got back in time for some really important information about the EEI due at the end of term. Of course the singing lesson was fun, they always are. This week I was working on I'm Not That Girl from Wicked, which is a really lovely song. And I learned a new technique that will "sandpaper out the awkward transition from chest voice to head voice" as the teacher puts it. It sounds ridiculous, but using it I can even get into whistle regester, which is generally accepted as COMPLETELY BLOODY IMPOSSIBLE.
Anyway, the tutorial lesson today was Art, so that was fun, I just did a slew of random oil pastel drawings, some of which I'm very proud of.
English was actually okay today, largely due to the fact that on my last piece of assessment I got an A-, a feat I've not achieved in English since year 7.
So I'm actually in a really good mood right now, since filming my part for a collab video that Nicko236 is doing on yewchewb, which should be fun and probably involve meeting some australian youtubers, which I always love doing.
And now I've got to do some stuff for my drama assessment and also pack for my dad's place this weekend.
It started by the fact that I was very nearly late. By which I mean if my guitar lesson had been at a time that wasn't 8:30, I would have been late because of the fact that I have to go up to the music studios, put my guitar in the room and then go to class, which takes about ten minutes, but I had time, what with going straight to the lesson. But that meant missing out on the first half of Art, and I love Art, it's nice and relaxing. And now I realise that I should be learning my script for drama, bollocks. Anyway, my english teacher appeared. She's always making jokes about me appearing and playing Stairway to Heaven. This cheered me up mildly, because in amongst her usual jokes, she started humming a tune, that SO wasn't Stairway. In fact, it was SO glaringly Sunshine Of Your Love.
But anyway, the reason I was nearly late was the fact that my mum or her girlfriend, not sure which, but probably the latter, had been tidying. Now, this is fine, but she's somehow not learned a very important fact about me. DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF. It sounds juvenile, I know, but my room is a complete mess for a reason, I KNOW WHERE EVERYTHING IS. As soon as you start organising things, that's when I lose them. It's like the way I never lose my stationary, I just lend it to people who do. Anyway, it took me longer than usual to find two textbooks (which I never ended up using anyway) that were, you guessed it, tidied away in a sensible place, the drawer. Stuff doesn't go in that drawer, because if it does, it gets lost forever.
So, at the lesson, Breen and Jermia (the other two in my group) cheered me up no end, and I even got some advice (thanks Breen). After the lesson I went on a tangent, because Breen is one of few people who don't immediately tune out when it looks like I'm about to launch into one of my infrequent but fun rants. I ranted about the usual things, family, friends, subjects, guitar ensemble, loss of sleep, stupids. Then I got to art and did my usual calm-down, ie. get out the oil pastels/coloured pencils (today it was the pastels) and draw some soothing, blue patterns on a piece of paper (this could be anything from curvy lines to repetedly writing "I like traffic lights" and believe me, there is a story behind the traffic lights) then hacking it to shreds with the scissors. Unfortuneately this did little to ease the tension that was probably turning into cancer. Maths did little to intellectually stimulate me, as usual.
Then it got suddenly less dreary. The day was turned around, it actually got good. There really is something that cheers me up as much as acting does. That is my weekly singing lesson. I got to miss out on the first part of Chemistry for it, so I completely got away with not doing my homework and got back in time for some really important information about the EEI due at the end of term. Of course the singing lesson was fun, they always are. This week I was working on I'm Not That Girl from Wicked, which is a really lovely song. And I learned a new technique that will "sandpaper out the awkward transition from chest voice to head voice" as the teacher puts it. It sounds ridiculous, but using it I can even get into whistle regester, which is generally accepted as COMPLETELY BLOODY IMPOSSIBLE.
Anyway, the tutorial lesson today was Art, so that was fun, I just did a slew of random oil pastel drawings, some of which I'm very proud of.
English was actually okay today, largely due to the fact that on my last piece of assessment I got an A-, a feat I've not achieved in English since year 7.
So I'm actually in a really good mood right now, since filming my part for a collab video that Nicko236 is doing on yewchewb, which should be fun and probably involve meeting some australian youtubers, which I always love doing.
And now I've got to do some stuff for my drama assessment and also pack for my dad's place this weekend.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Daily Booth
http://dailybooth.com/izziesmagicalglasses
Follow me on Daily Booth!
Essentially you take a picture with your webcam every day for a year, pretty much everyone on the site is a youtuber, and of course, if there's a bandwagon started by youtubers, no doubt I'll jump on it.
JOIN TEAM GLASSES AND FOLLOW ME!
Of course, I'm not going to declare war on Team Coollike or Team Meekakitty, mainly because they have FAR MORE SUBSCRIBERS ON YOUTUBE THAN I DO, and Charlieissocoollike is some kind of youtube god. So, no, I will not declare war, but yeah...I kindof lost my train of thought there...
Follow me on Daily Booth!
Essentially you take a picture with your webcam every day for a year, pretty much everyone on the site is a youtuber, and of course, if there's a bandwagon started by youtubers, no doubt I'll jump on it.
JOIN TEAM GLASSES AND FOLLOW ME!
Of course, I'm not going to declare war on Team Coollike or Team Meekakitty, mainly because they have FAR MORE SUBSCRIBERS ON YOUTUBE THAN I DO, and Charlieissocoollike is some kind of youtube god. So, no, I will not declare war, but yeah...I kindof lost my train of thought there...
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